New students at Christmastime!

Hey, hey, hey. Whattup guys, I wanted to talk to you before I leave for my Official Christmas Vacation today. Remember I told you I was going on one 4 days after my pre-christmas vacation? Well, today is the day and my airplane flight is about to go so I just wanted to introduce you to some more extremely distant relatives I found in. . .guess where? PARIS, FRANCE! HAH! Wait till my best buddy Julien finds out these new students are from his home city! HAH! Sorry about those hyperventilated laughs I lash out from nowhere, I have problems. I'm sick. I take medicine for it. Forget what I just said. Okay, continuing. So, the first two are VERY cool. They are both superheroes and are always saving Paris from trouble and danger. I introduce you. . .LADYBUG AND CAT NOIR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!


There is Ladybug, but she is telling us to call her Marinette, she prefers that. Oh there she goes, changing her costume. Also, Cat Noir and Marinette's Kwamis: Tikki and Plagg, will also be students. Here they come, along with Cat Noir who prefers to be called Adrien.


Hey you stupid Cat Noir, stop winking at Marinette, you know she doesn't like you! Ugh, God.


And there he goes touching her without my permission. You lay another sausage on my aunt's fat friend's diabetic daughter's Hepatitis C neighbor's deceased great-grandma's ugly caretaker's pen pal's daughter, I will fry you alive in my oven! Sorry about all that violence there, guys, but it's the truth. Adrien is a smug person that acts fresh around others. Also, this is Plagg and Tikki. Plagg is trying to date Tikki but she despises him. Come out, Plagg and Tikki!


Aren't they just cute? I would like to tell you how they are related to me, but I don't think it's possible I will ever stop explaining the whole entire way that they are connected to me. It's WAY too long and not worth my time when I could be eating instead. WHOOPS! I completely forgot the most important one right before I force my waiters to transport me on a wheelchair all the way to the airport! There's one last student I invited, and she is Julien's unknown kid that he had with Gal Gadot. Don't ask how she is the same age, you don't want to know that one. Well, here she is! I introduce, Alizee!
  
Look, everyone, she's waving! Isn't she just pretty?

Oh no. What am I seeing here? RAMSES WAS RUNNING AWAY FROM THE 8 PLAGUES AND FELL DOWN AND BROKE HIS TOE AND SCREAMED IN PAIN AND MOSES TRIED TO HELP HIM BUT WAS TOO SCARED OF THE LOCUSTS SO HE CRASHLANDED ON ZIPPORAH WHO ROLLED WITH HIM ALL THE WAY INTO A HOLE AND THEY CALLED FOR HELP BUT NO ONE CAME AND THEY HAD TO GET OUT THEMSEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELVES!!!!!!!!!!! Wow, that was the longest time I ever did something like that. But besides that, STAY AWAY FROM ALIZEE YOU STUPID ADRIEN! I even came up with a name for you because I hate you so much. It's Adrien + Idiot = Idiodrien or Adridiot! And plus, Alizee has a boyfriend, I'm sorry. His name is Chico but he is on a mission to the Galapagos right now and can't come, so from now on you leave Alizee be, you hear me Adrien? YOU HEAR ME?! Okay, I think you heard me. Now, I will have my assistant keep their eye on you at all times to make sure you don't try her or something while I'm gone, if you know what I mean. WHOOPS! Shouldn't have made that implication, SO GROSS! Okay, ASSISTANT!!!!!!!!! 

Stop running so slow, you stupidass! You know you can run faster than that! Now hurry up, cause this bozo needs to be restrained and watched over.

Yes, that's RIGHT! I'm not stupid enough like everyone thinks I am to leave you here with Alizee, who's unguarded and unprotected. My assistant will make sure you're under his eye at all times, YOU GOT MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE?!!!!!!! And I don't care if you're pissed! Your fake love you're telling me about for Alizee is not real, it's only a grossom state of mind called infatuation! Okay, I gotta leave. My airplane flight is leaving. . .NOOOOOOOOOOW!!!!!! I'M MISSING IT! ASSISTAAAAAAAAANTS!!!!!!! HELP, HELP, HEEEEEEEEEEEEELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I'M GONNA MISS MY CHRISTMAS VACATION, NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! BYE, GUYS! I'LL BE BACK SOON!

I'm returned!

HEY GUYS! It's me, your teacher! I'm finally back from my super long 2 month-long vacation. I also left because I didn't want to face Prince Zuko, I was too scared. But don't blame me, go call the teacher for help. Oh wait, I am the teacher. Well, besides that. I had an awesome time during my only-for-me trip. I went to SO many amazing places like Denmark, Hawaii, Disney World, Universal, etc. I even went to visit some family. They're actually pretty dysfunctional so I didn't stay for long, I hate them. It was like Around The World In 80 Days, HAH! I also got to see the Taj Mahal. And I went to see the legendary city of the tiny Makhunik people, and guess what? IT'S REAL! I should tell Ariana that her blood descends from such extraordinary little people. I even have some pictures of my vacay, wanna see? Here they are.   

This one was one I took in Denmark, I took a shot of this particular landscape with the church because it was so beautiful it made me cry. So natural and filled of wilderness, just amazing. I stayed in the countryside because I hate cities, too much unnatural technology-filled dung there. No offense, Denmarken people. In fact, I even rode my big white horse that almost looked like a unicorn or Pegasus through these lands. Her name is Destiny. She's beautiful. She runs out in the meadows but I will never tell you where because I don't want you looking for her and trying to ride on her, you bastard. You don't deserve her! Here are the others I took from the other places I visited.

 

This is Hawaii.

Whoops, I don't even remember taking that one. But just to say, the coconut coladas they give you there? Oh my precious God Jehovah, they are outstanding! I ordered like five every time. Aw man, if only the stupid loads of dung I have as waiters here knew how to make coladas like these. But they don't know shit, so yeah.  

This is Disney World of course, the Legend. I was taking this photo while the parade was going on. You should see Disney World during Christmas time, it's so magical!

Universal. I got a selfie of myself sampling two mega cups of butterbeer but I think I lost it. Too bad. Also, I took some pictures with my family but they were so rude they broke my camera because they didn't want me taking pictures of them. Assholes. Whatever, who needs them? I left shortly after that and framed them for a crime just to get the police over to their house to arrest them. I'm so glad I did that.

 

This is the Taj Mahal.

And last but not least, the most fascinating Makhunik city of Iranian dwarves. It's amazing. I loved it all. Well, that's all there is to it. I still have loads more but I don't have time to show them all. Anyways, this is most definitely not the last of my trips. I'm going on another one in two days, it's going to be my annual pre-Christmas vacation. What? No I'm not going to be patient for Winter Break, I do what I want, you freakin' godforsaken doofus! Besides, I'm also going on my OFFICIAL Christmas vacation four days after my return from my pre-Christmas vacation. So yeah, I'm really in my happy place right now. Now I gotta go rest for a couple of hours, I ate 10 chili dogs on that plane flight back here.