A fun blog for all to read!
Note: This is a parody blog. No copyright infringement intended. All rights belong to their respective owners. This is all just for fun!
We're finally having Ballet class again guys! Fun, right? Get out your ballet costumes! Here are some new students who came here because they also want to be a part of this school of SHOW YOUR FOOT TO THE WORLD. Their names are Chris Parker and Daryl Coopersmith!
Chris, put the phone down please, you talk to your friends enough, say hello to the students instead.
Look, even Hermione is saying hello!
Oh please, Chris! Hermione is not a sleaze like you think, she is just trying to have some fun.
Now, does everybody have their ballet clothes on? Alright, let's begin, our ballet dancer assistant here will show us how to dance. Her name is Rosalia. Oh wait, Rosalia couldn't come. Instead, Lilith is here. Come out Lilith! Everybody wants to see you show your best moves of ballet!
Watch Lilith guys. Alright, now that you saw her, dance a little to show me what you know.
Whoa, whoa, Chris, calm it down. You are going tense on this dancing thing, anyway, who are you talking about?
Hermione! AWESOME DANCING! Oh, I see you are practicing with our assistant, Jimmy. How nice. Class over!
Sunday, August 23, 2015
Alright guys, it has been more than four days already I think. Give in the books please, and I want you all to show me a tiny piece of the plot I asked you write about the story I gave you to read. Collins goes first.
Okay, okay, calm down, this is just a little Plot Planner.
(Hatchet novel)
Hmm, let's see. Brian Robeson. . .thirteen years old. . .Cessna 406 plane. . .dies from massive heart attack. Wow! Collins! You actually got everything right! Every single word! Brilliant, I love the organizing of each sentence, the interest, and the---oh, Collins, so good! You get 100%!
I know, stunning, right?
Second, Erm!
(Percy Jackson The Lightning Thief novel)
Oh my gosh! Awesome, Erm! Awesome! 100%! Third, Nau!
(The Book Thief novel)
Nau, brilliant work! 100%! Fourth, Constanze!
Don't worry, if you did it correctly, I will grade you nicely. Let me see it.
We are having Chicans History class again! We didn't have it for a long time, did we? Well we are having it, so let's start! I want all of you to write a portion about yourself and your life and past, and I want you to write all that in Chicans. Alright? Okay, while you are doing that, I tell you a little about their Government systems and how it works, we have already gone through our first module in Chicans History, which was Chicans History: Culture. Take a look at our Chicans History class chart, we are moving very quickly and fast.
So, like I was saying. The government in chicans is not much different from ours here in America, the USA. But what it does differ in is the queen they have. They have one queen who rules over the lands, and five other people to rule. The queen Elise Berhamyso, her daughter, Ella Tho, Whoppelier the governor, Marhee, Segham, and Lovveneu. They all decide for Chicans, and they love to do it. The home life at the castle is very peculiar in some ways. When they eat foods such as rice and estuvaditch, they have to eat grain after grain, no half-pound spoons. That is the funny thing about them. So, essays, essays, bring in the life essays, please, now!
Jane, god! Stop being a drama queen, you weren't ready for the university, simple as that! Where is your life essay? Oh, there, let me see it please.
What a nice little essay, Jane. And oh my gosh, every word, spelling, and grammar you wrote in Chicans is awesome and correct! Let me translate it. Hello, my name is Jane Foster. I live in New Mexico with my family, Doctor Selvig and Darcy. I have a passion for science and I am very good at it. My favorite food is fishticks dipped in custard. I also play the sax, that instrument, remember it? I think you do. I also hope that you liked my passage of my life. Goodbye! By Jane Foster, to Teacher? Oh, Jane, it is so lovely! I love it so much! Great job! A+ and 100% on your Chicans language essay!
Listen guys, today we are having Flying Class because we haven't had it in a very long time, and you guys forgot how to do it I reckon. So now let me teach you, but first, we will have the testing performed on you to see what you remember and memorize so we can see which group you belong in when you are learning in Flying Class.
See those circles outlined there? Well anyway, let me explain to you the system of these groups. Group A is for the students who specifically remember everything I taught them and still have their stamina and endurance and don't need to start from the beginning again, they can move on from the high spot they were in before. Now Group B is for the students who still know their flying, but forgot some things and are not really as good as they were before. Group C, the last group, is for the students who have not been practicing their flying strokes and positions for weeks, months, and a lot of time and forgot everything. I will take out a list of names of the students and call out your names, now there will be no such things said that I am discriminatory against certain students if I think you are supposed to be put in Group B or Group C. Alright? Alright. Now, let the testing commence! Hermione Granger! And don't worry, if you don't pass to Group A it won't be a big problem, just show me whatever I ask you to show me, and if you can't remember or do it, just come over to be the first in your group. Simple as that, step up here Hermione, and show me your best Peter Pan style.
Good job! But you need to work on your Peter Pan Style a bit more, focusing on which direction you fly into, you need to be facing into a straight arrow. You go to Group B. Next, Ermengarde Vandergelder! Show me your best Cross-Fold Gulch.
Perfect! It is just perfect! Go to Group A! I can see someone has been practicing their flying strokes.
NO, NO, AND NO THOR! NO WEAPONS ARE ALLOWED IN FLYING TESTS, BECAUSE THEY HELP YOU FLY. Natasha, take Mjolnir away from Thor this instant, please.
Good. So anyway, I'll sort you all out after you show me your flying, Thor goes into Group C. Natasha, you next. Go!
Hello guys, this is me again, and new students have come. The first one is eager to be here, her name is Isabella Swan, but she likes to be called Bella. Understand? Understand.
Hey Bella, I see you like this place, looking around at everything, would you like to pick yourself a personal room like Erm and Nau did, or would you like to stay in the big bedroom with all the other students?
Oh, alright. You can sleep with the other students, good choice, that is what I recommend. So anyway, here is two other students.
This one is Elijah Wood.
Don't be scared, Elijah. It's going to be alright.
And this is Anakin Skywalker.
Elijah wants to go to the pet shop with Bella, do you want to come?
Students, it is time for Baking class. I know we already had one, but what's the fun without second classes about the same thing? So anyway, we will be baking a certain snack that everybody in this classroom loves. The first one to go is going to be Jane.
Ahaha! You want to do this? Well anyway, we will be making Lotus Flowers and French Meringue cookies. Here is a mini recipe video of how to make Lotus Flowers for all of you to see. And then I will show you another mini recipe video of how to make French Meringue cookies. So let's get started!
Interesting, right? Now take a look at this other one.
Mmmm, doesn't that just look delicious and appetizing? So are you ready, Jane? Go for it! Which one do you want to do first?
You say you want to do Lotus Flowers first and Meringue cookies after? Alright, start. Maybe you would like to use my mixture that I already started beating, here you go.
Beat it some more, you got it, Jane! There you go, on to the next step. Anyway, I want you to know that I already added the other ingredients in there, which includes the coconut milk, rice flour, and water. Mmm-hmmm, that is exactly how you do it. Anyway, the next step is to roll up two balls of tinfoil. Smack them against a solid platform to make the bottom flat. Then grab the wand with the shape of the lotus flower and put it in a pot. Next, pour canola oil into the pot. Add enough oil to cover the wand. Then pull the wand out of the pot while it is oily and dip it into the mixture you have created. The mixture should stick to the wand. Once you are done with that, move the wand back into the pot. This will cause the mixture stuck to the wand to drop into the pot a form a lotus flower shape. Make two shapes. After that, use tongs to pull them out of the pot and place them on the balls. Make others. Then keep on making more until you have enough to fill a plate. Once you are done, make a hybrid color to dip the cookies in. Maybe the color should be pink or purple or dark pink or green. You can decide.
Oh, excuse me if I am not letting you finish your job.
Well I see you made three balls of tinfoil instead, but that is okay. Then there will be more than enough to eat.
What's so funny about what I said? GASP! The Lotus Flowers are ready, look at them!
So now it's time for the trying and judging part. My assistant, Annabeth Chase, will be the one trying them.
What, Annabeth? You say they taste good? Well, Jane, you are a pretty successful student, I see. They must taste very good that they come to the limit for a very strict assistant to like them. I think I must have one myself.
Yummy, this tastes delicious! Now it is time to make the Meringue cookies.
Well somebody seems surprised. Come on, start. Remember, beat the eggs until they are foamy and poofy. Keep on beating until the eggs look like a creamy frosting.
Yeah, like that. That is good. Next step is to use a ziploc bag and a metal piece. Put those together to make a piping bag. Next, pour the creamy frosting into three different bowls. In each bowl, add one droplet of fruit coloring. One droplet of yellow fruit coloring, one droplet of blue fruit coloring, and one droplet of red fruit coloring. Mix these all together and, it will make a yellowish, peach-colored, blue mixture. After that, use a spoon to stuff the creamy frosting into the piping bag. Once you are done with this, grab a tray and squeeze the piping bag. Make swirls. You can put them as close as you like, but not too close, because then they will stick together. Next step is to put them in the oven. Wait for 1 hour and 45 minutes, and then take them out. Meringue cookies are meant to be a delicious treat, easily made, and extremely crunchy. They taste the best when they have just been made. Whoa, the Meringue cookies are done! Take them out of the oven. Let me see them.
Well I have to say, they look pretty good. Almost like in the video. Annabeth, try one.
Woohoo! You did a great job, Jane! Who else wants to---HOLY CRICKETS! LOOK AT THE TIME! Sorry guys, class canceled. You all have to go to bed. Good night.
This is a class where we will be reading novels, books, plays, and stories. Then you guys will give them in and tell me what you have learned from them and what is their plot. You each have about four days to finish your book I handled to you.
Collins, you know that four days is enough for you to finish a novel. Especially you! Because I've seen the way you can finish a comic book about Magix in three hours. This is basically the same thing. So anyway, beginning with Collins. You will read Hatchet.
Constanze will read All Creatures Great And Small.
Oh please! What is wrong with my class?
So anyway, like I was saying. Wizardology for Hermione, her favorite.
HERMIONE! LISTEN YOU GUYS, YOU READ THESE BOOKS IN FOUR DAYS EXACTLY! BEGINNING NOW! END OF THE CONVERSATION! AND THAT'S FINAL! HAH!
